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  FAQ's for Parents  
 

What do I say to my child who is being victimized? 

  • LISTEN TO YOUR CHILD. 
  • Do not tell your child to ignore the bullying.  If they could they would not be telling you about it.
  • Your child needs to hear that it’s not his fault and that there is nothing wrong with him. 
  • Let him know that the bully’s aggressive behavior is the source of the problem. 
  • Assure your child that you will not go behind his back and do anything that does not feel comfortable to him. 
  • Bullying hurts children’s self-esteem.  Keep reminding them of their strengths and skills. 
  • Hug your child frequently and let him know how much you love him.

Can the school help?
Work with school personnel who can offer help and advice.  Find out if the school has policies and procedures on bullying.  Research indicates that schools with anti bullying policies have fewer occurrences.  Keep records of incidents and record meetings with staff and other parties. 

Should I approach the bully’s parents?
That could easily aggravate the situation.  Some parents of bullies may not see anything wrong with bullying and equate it with teasing or looking after oneself. 

Should I talk to the bully?
We don’t encourage this idea as it may reinforce the bully’s impression that your child is weak and unable to stand up for himself.   You need to empower your child and restore their sense of dignity.

What do I do if the bullying continues or escalates?
If the bullying has taken place at school and you have already notified them, you may need to contact legal authorities.  Many states have bullying laws and policies.  Find out about the laws in your community. 

If my child is in an abusive friendship with someone and is being physically/emotionally abused, what can I do?
You need to have a discussion with your child on respect, kindness and the characteristics of a real friend.  Encourage your child to break the ties and watch your child carefully as you are having the conversation.  Ask if they are afraid to drop the relationship.  Perhaps your child is being threatened.

Is there anything else I can do for my child?
A healthy diet, physical exercise and a whole lot of loving and hugging can work wonders to reduce a child’s anxiety and keep them physically healthy.  A self-defense class or a gym class will strengthen them and boost their confidence level. 

Does bullying occur in private schools?
Accused of negligent supervision, a Tampa, Florida private school paid $4M to a family whose son was tragically victimized last year.  Bullying can happen everywhere and unfortunately it does.  Both public and private schools need to develop and enforce anti bullying policies and procedures.  

Gangs And Violence

What is youth violence?
Youth violence refers to harmful behaviors that can start early and continue into young adulthood.  The cost of youth violence exceeds $158 billion each year.

Bullying behavior is considered to be a precursor to youth violence and a marker for more serious violent behaviors.  Studies indicate that 60% of boys, who were classified by researchers as bullies in grades six through nine, have at least one criminal conviction by age 24.   Reports further indicate a bully’s behavior often advances to sexual abuse, date rape, domestic violence or elder abuse.

What is a gang?
A gang is a group of teens and young adults that hang out together and are involved in joint violent, illegal, or criminal activity.  

How can I tell if my child is involved in a gang?
The most common ways are: tattoos, clothing, jewelry, new friends that your child doesn’t want you to meet, skipping school, drop in grades, questionable signs and symbols on books, clothes, bedroom walls and other personal belongings.

What should I do if I suspect my child is involved in a gang?

  • Talk to your child.
  • Watch for some of the signs to confirm your suspicion.
  • Try to listen to your child’s conversation with friends and acquaintances – old and new.
  • Take stock of your child’s room from time to time and look for signs and symbols.
  • You may want to talk to your child’s teacher about your suspicions.
  •  Try to divert your child’s time and attention into other activities.
  • Seek private counseling, help from community agencies or talk to the police.

PARENTS:  YOUR CHILDREN ARE AT GREAT RISK IF THEY BELONG TO A GANG.   DON’T GET CAUGHT THINKING THIS IS JUST A PASSING PHASE AND THAT YOUR CHILD WILL OUTGROW IT.   EARLIER GANG MEMBERS USE NEWER ONES TO TAKE THE BIGGEST RISKS.  IF THE NEWER GANG MEMBERS ARE CAUGHT, THE OLDER ONES WILL OFTEN DENY ANY CONNECTION.

Attention Parents!!!!

Champions Against Bullying offers coaching and consultations to you and your children.   Because shame and blame are involved, children may be embarrassed and may also feel that you will be disappointed in them.  As a result, they may not share everything they’re experiencing.  We will give your child the skills to beat the bullying and boost their self-confidence.  Let’s prevent the negative consequences associated with this demeaning disrespectful behavior.  Phone consultations are available. 

For further information, please contact us: info@championsagainstbullying.com